Monday, May 11, 2015

Monday Momfessions: May 11 Week

Aka the Mother's Day Edition:

1. Raise your hand if the first thing you did on Mother's Day was change a poopy diaper. Yep, me too.    Insert jazz hands and "Happy Freakin' Mother's Day!" here. A mother's duty? Or is it doody?

2. I think I read somewhere by KS law that at least two mimosas are required by 11 a.m. on Mother's Day. Here's hoping you were as compliant as I was.

3. Related: in both KS and MO, a minimum of two giant cinnamon rolls is required for consumption. Did you meet your lawful obligations?

4. I secretly tried to get my Mother's Day present purchase out of my five year old for over a week. When he wouldn't budge even under conspiracy or bribery, I tried for the two year old. Darn limited vocabulary. 

5. The best part of my day was catching up with the DVR under a fluffy blanket, all alone, while one slept and the rest ran errands. Ok, ok, their warm hugs and kisses and darling cards and gifts were the best. But that DVR...definitely a close second. MCDREAMY?!

6. Speaking of McDreamy, I pretended to sleep in until 7 but really watched a whole second episode in the comfort and quiet of our bed while mass chaos ensured on the decks below. Shhhhh. What?! I thought this was totally allowed on this day! Mom code, right?!

7. There is nothing, nothing better than a little handprint trinket. Ok, maybe, MAYBE diamonds, but seriously. Their stinky pinkies and sausage hands are just so darn cute! Mike: next year - diamonds!

8. At one point this phrase may have been heard around this house: "WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME ON MOTHER'S DAY?! THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE A DAY OF RELAXATION AND APPRECIATION!!!!" Don't ask me who said it (and maybe in a not so relaxed tone) and please don't talk to my parents who may have a very similar story about a certain girl's 13-year old birthday party in which she kicked all of her friends out of the house for not properly playing Barbies...

9. The day before, I straight up did the grocery money trick and got my nails done. In gel and patterns. And didn't even feel guilty about it once. Not until we didn't have bread the next day...

10. In and out I was secretly weepy all day, the intense awesomeness of being a mother filling me with overwhelming gratitude. Luckily there was some sibling rivalry and daredevil toddler shenanigans to break it up a few rounds in between, but overall it was a mushy, squishy day of wonderfulness.

May you have felt cherished and celebrated and that it continues each day forward. Because Momma: you deserve it! 

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