Tuesday, October 7, 2014

Monday Momfessions: October 6 Week

1. Today the Big went to school in yesterday's uniform. And his brother's socks. He may or may not have showered last evening. But nobody knew, right?! And he felt very fratastic about it all. Some days it's about doing the best you can with what you've got. And what we didn't have was a clean uniform.

2. Related: the Little went to school on Monday with one shoe. One. Again - doing the best with what we got, which apparently does not include sanity or a tiny New Balance. Meanwhile a doting mother dropped her child and apologized profusely for forgetting shoes and promised to run home and drop off a pair back at school. Perhaps we could be friends because opposites attract.

3. When invited to jump at a child's trampoline party, choose your activities carefully. Momma ain't 25 anymore, which means a potential rescue from the styrofoam pit and things jiggling you didn't even know you had when trying the jumps. Don't even get me started on the bladder thing even my bff forgot to tell me about. Oye.

4. I totally blamed the Pop Tart purchase during this evening's grocery run on the Big and I'm not even a little bit ashamed. Can't wait for tomorrow morning's frosted, strawberry delight.

5. The Big's bunk has become my new favorite hiding place. For napping, reading and accidentally falling asleep in it all evening long. Move over, Sleep Number. You may have been replaced by a cheap Serta or something that's even twin sized.

6. One advantage of a five year old son turning into an amazing helper who is caring, has a heart of gold and likes to spend time with you is that he'll take the time to rummage through your closet, paint your nails and weigh handbag purchase options. It's like having your bff in a tiny male package for the short term. Perhaps with even more honesty, transparency and rationale when it comes to critiquing ensems.

7. Making the birthday party rounds on weekends is worth it for the energy release required for boys and the cupcakes. Oh, and bonding with the parents. But those cupcakes...

8. When attending social events with children five and under, please anticipate saying only five and under actual words to friends and guests. The rest of the time will include phases like: "stay away from the fire! where are your clothes? please take turns! where is your brother! no, no, no! i'm not sure how to work that nerf gun. let me help you with that juice box. please put the cushions back on the couch. please remove yourself from your friend's face, etc."

9. The Little has discovered how to flurburt bellies, with an affinity for mine. Well, at least that C-section pouch is good fun for someone.

10. Bullying incidents will bring out the mama bear in anyone. You may even find yourself mumbling secret threats, using the word "shank," and leaving anonymous notes. This will not help the cause or your street cred, but the uncontrollable force to protect and serve your children will win every time.

What are you guilty of this week, mommy friends?

No comments: