Monday Momfessions - May 13 Week

Squeak saying "Hi there, ladies!"

1. Gardening with an over 10-pounder strapped front and center Bjorn-style is harder than it looks. My apologies in advance to the neighbors for the catawompous placement of the geraniums. Also, did it make you nervous when I stood on a chair and placed the hanging plants? Yah - in hindsight not the best move.

2. When running errands and returning home, I feel a bit guilty leaving Squeak in the car seat (inside with me observing of course). Then I finally accomplish one small thing I've been meaning to do for four weeks and it subsides a bit. Ok, a lot.

3. I secretly wanted a massage and nap on Mother's Day. Don't get me wrong - it was near perfect and largely appreciated, but these two things did.not.happen. Somehow, Daddy got to take a nap?! PS: he's still complaining of his pulled glute muscle (Corporate Challenge football practice) - someone please send me some more images of empathetic faces because I'm all out.

4. I'm drinking a half soda and hitting Starbucks for Passion Iced Teas nearly daily. This is a) not healthy for the feeder b) not in the budget. Shhhh. Must.stop. But, sometimes Mommy needs a fix...and it's not one that requires illegal paraphernalia (though you'd think so in my efforts to stash the Starbucks cups before hubs gets home).

5. The amazing flow of visitors in and out of our home daily is the only thing keeping our home quasi-clean and requiring I shower daily. Thank you, dear friends, for keeping me on the up and up.

6. Today marks day four of my most anxiety-ridden task: taking both kids to daycare (well, Little Dude to pre-school, but you know this isn't the 60s where you could leave the other one in the car sans car seat and all). Surprisingly, our dry runs are going ok - you know, if arriving with no makeup, yoga pants and just out of bed can count as the dress rehearsal. Yah - not even close. Still anxious.

7. Though much more hormonally balanced than with Little Dude, I've had three minor meltdowns in the past week: 1) Stashing away the newborn clothes FOREVER (so foreboding) as Squeak has already outgrown them, causing me to question my mortality...ok, just get a little sad this is our last baby. 2) In the thick of the night, thinking through how much Little Dude's relationship and mine have changed and wonder what it means for our forever bond 3) Those damn Mother's Day commercials, including the red-headed kid where she brushes his hair back through his childhood to the Hallmark handprint cards. Don't ask. And yes, I've recovered - remember the Starbucks runs?

8. I'm not making Squeak do much tummy time - it still breaks my heart. I know it's good for them and all, but how can one not conjure up images of a little baby bird trying to make it in this big world? Of a new horse finding it's legs? A duck learning to swim? Ok, I don't know what I'm talking about anymore, but I don't like crying babies and it makes him angry, therefore there is limited tummy time.

9. I still don't understand how so much poop can flow through one child. As soon as one gets on, another is required. How...HOW?!

10. I have not earned my badges in taking two children to one birthday party and am incredibly grateful only Little Dude and I did the one on Saturday. How do you people do it?!

So, what's new in your mommydom in the past week?

Salons and Sons

"Really, this may be the only time he 'electively' attends a salon visit with me," I giggle with my stylist as a small gaggle of girls croons over Squeak, a beautiful thing to have when you're attempting to get a 'do and the dude won't stop fussing. "This may be the closest we come to Mommy/Son mani/pedi time," I concluded as we watched inches of hair fall from around my cheekbones, pondering if I should leave tips for all the awesome women taking turns bending their knees and singing lullabyes while I got a neck massage in the sink nearby. Recall: it takes a village. And really, what man doesn't like three or more beauitful women crooning at him and thinking he's the world?

One hour later, a new lipstick shade already in place (remember a pop of color makes everything better/refreshed/looks like you actually did something with yourself) and the new reverse bob (shaved on back bottom then cut back to front - crazy!), we concluded our visit, modeling the "swing," picking up some products and heading on our way. Oh - and of course we had to stop for a milk snack in what was shockingly a new location for me...the spray tan room. I gotta admit I've pumped and nursed in a lot of places, but that was a new one. Hopefully I won't hit the Tabloids like the tan mom situation thingy...

Salon and son near post delivery: highly recommend it. After all, every woman deserves to feel a bit human again, even if it does end in a spray booth with no spray at the end.

Happy primping!

Appreciating the Teachers

domesticallyspeaking.com

Tomorrow marks another teacher appreciation day, a chance to really make an effort outside of your weekly praises of those who are helping to grow and shape your kiddos into the marvelous beings they are today. This year, our Misses will receive this Pinterest project (praying there aren't like 10 already on the counter when I walk in tomorrow) along with Target gift cards and a plate of goodies for the rest of the crew:

cooks.com

Shout out to my bffs, most of who teach in our local KC schools with patience, wisdom, creativity and wonder. May each student who wanders into this profession have the kind of grace, patience, dignity and care that you do and I pray my children have teachers just like you in the future. Thank you for taking on one of the hardest careers a gal could and making the most of it to impact good little citizens of the world. We love and appreciate you!

Don't forget to appreciate your teachers and nurses this week!

Monday Momfessions - May 6 Week

1. Stuff just got real. We're talking real, real. This two kids business...is real. Enough said. Magical. Cool. Amazing. But holy cow: real.

2. Currently our lives circulate around breasts more than I'd care for, including frequent showings, endless explanations of nipples to a 3 yo, Pamela Anderson look alikes which may be cool except they hurt so damn bad (and they are temporary without surgical intervention later in life), Lanolin, udder cream, nursing bras, nursing pads, nursing cover ups and so much more. I swear these two need their own entourage for how much attention they currently require. Let me know if you want their autographs.

3. Milk confession #2: I've become so lazy with the second that I opt for a warm shower and the bathroom sink vs. that cursed pump. So.guilty.

4. You know that Hallmark card that's part of the Mom line that says: "Don't worry: you're not the first person who saw pee on the sheets and just threw a towel over it and went back to bed." Yah. That happened.

5. I'm overwhelmed with love and joy at the "band of mothers," friends and family that make the village of survival for those first two weeks of bringing a child home. The power of women surpasses every expectation and I'm incredibly grateful for those that line my circle and their amazing hearts.

6. It's official: I no longer understand cute boy outfits. The collars? Cover their face and noses. The socks? Don't stay on. Crap that has to go over their head? Angers them. Onesies it is. Adios adorable GAP wear that doesn't meet this criteria. I'm sure like his older brother, he'll resort to Nike and Adidas by two anyway. Only non-negotiable times: picture day and tea time with the ladies.

7. In the past week, I've secretly used the TV as a babysitter for two hours so I could sit on the couch with both boys. Yikes.

8. We attempted our first outing on Sunday complete with an outfit, light makeup, hair and even my wedding ring (yay, it fit - despite my shoes still don't). Result: not worth it. Let's get back to the ponytail and yoga pants and revisit feminine beauty in a week or two, shall we?

9. I had to be readmitted to the hospital over the weekend (I'm fine) and all I could think about with all the attention on my feet due to blood pressure was that I should've updated my pedi. That and how much I wanted to steal that comfortable hospital bed and the shaved ice machine. And maybe one of the friendly nurses. Perhaps my priorities are a bit out of whack here.

10. Little Dude constantly attends school and goes through his day with mismatched socks. Being slightly OCD, this stresses him out. My treat to him this week is to go through and get that ones that currently fit him and get them organized. But then - how the hell do you keep up with these shenanigans with that sock monster (oh and the dog) messing with the system? Truly,  I don't get it. Plus, mismatched socks provide some flair. I mean hey, little girls have a whole line of socks dedicated to this art. Business idea?!

I assure you this list is much longer as we transition to a family of four here on the west side, but some things even I can't put into print. So what are you guilty of Mama?

About That Baby Book...

"Um, yah - that's so not happening," I said to my girlfriend as she displayed her lovely, perfectly poignant captured memories in the form of a scrapbook in front of me. I marveled at the pages, delighting in her creativity and ability to capture all the magical moments with her kids and thought to myself:

H to the no - as fantastic as that would be, let's get real here. In fact, Little Dude's book lay undone from pregnancy to his first year, the only things well documented are some photos chronologically placed in book. Plus a darling tin a girlfriend made month by month that contains scraps of paper highlighting firsts, a treat I love to pull out on his birthdays.

So for Squeaks, here is the plan:

Carter's First Year Calendar with major milestones and events etched in with my favorite Sharpie

A file box with organized folders month by month that can be filled with little treasures, pics and memories

And of course we still have this:

A no pressure, tiny five line space to complete the most vivid memory of the day with your child

And I'm not going back - that means no trying to get crafty and gah forbid get on Pinterest and see what those other savvy Moms are doing to document all the kid awesomeness. The blog and Shutterfly will also remain full I'm almost certain, so with that...

Wa la...our version of a baby book. I can't wait to revisit them in the future!

The Gift That Keeps on Giving

"Oh my goodness - how precious!" I said as Big L tore open his gift and his brother's, revealing two muscle-adorned shirts illustrating Jayhawk pride. Prancing around the room, Big L claimed he was now a KU football player and off he went, teasing his Dad with his favorite antics of "you love K-state!" Clearly the gift was a hit.

The first of many, this genius present was given to the kiddos from their "Aunt Kate" as a way to show their school pride (read: also brainwash them into attending KU - a shared goal with his father) and give back to the college itself with the Jayhawk Generations Membership. Affordable and adorable, the gift truly keeps on giving with small packages of growth charts, dining wear, piggy banks, a plush Jay, hats and more arrive at your doorstep over the course of the year, delighting the recipient with it's unexpected timing and of course, the commitment to the crimson and blue.

Just the other day, Big Jay arrived in the mail. Since then, he's made a good bed fellow for Big L, who flaunts him with pride, and even offered to share him with Little L when the tears begin to fall.  

The Jayhawk Generations Membership: the gift that keeps on giving. Thanks P family!

Surviving the "C"

5 a.m. on "go" day!

"Dude-I don't know anything about C-sections, and I don't think 10 hours before I'm scheduled to deliver, now in this way, is the time to go poppin' in videos or anything," I said to my girlfriend as we marveled at the anticipation the new few hours and a whopping expected 9.5 pound baby held for me. And so I went in with no expectations given the plan had changed 12 hours in advance, a bit of anxiety and fretting the recovery. And you know what? The C-section itself was kind of...fun?! With two extremely kind anesthesiologists (the dudes went and grabbed warm blankets even on their pay grade), one sassy OB and a lot of laughter and exclamations at the arrival of our incredible hulk, I wouldn't have done it any other way (given of course there were several clinical reasons to do so).

But then there's that whole recovery thing afterward...the winding journey of "I want to comfort my 3 yo during this transition and also clean sweep the whole house but can't drive or take the stairs and I have to rely on others for everything and don't you know I'm a woman" situation. A few folks have asked for tips on getting through, and now that we're a week in, here's what I'd recommend:

1. Manage your pain: stay ahead of the pain meds, or rather, right on time. Though every recovery is different, I found doing this made it pretty seamless by popping every four hours and getting on with the rest of the day as planned.

2. Walk hourly: as soon as the feeling returns to your legs, wander those halls every hour to 90 minutes, even if the nurses at the station do begin to look bored of you. And bring that baby along - you'll enjoy the coos of how cute he/she is, therefore helping you ignore the biting pain. Do the same when you get home (though limiting stairs can be helpful).

3. Embrace your circle: delegate, let others assist, welcome those meals, pre-schooler distractions, errand running and sock finding missions - all while you put your still swollen cankles up on the ottoman. Generally the most helpful baseman: husbands, Moms, neighbors and best friends. What a blessing to have these amazing players in life!

4. Drink oodles of water: take that much coveted birthing souvenir and fill it up hourly and pour it down as if it was your first glass of Riesling post delivery. And if you're still admitted, enjoy that crushed ice - you can only get those suckers at Sonic these days.

5. Elect for the granny panties: sexy or not (note: NOT), elect for something like the Hanes high waisted briefs at Target that sit near your belly button, avoiding your incision and if I were to be truthful, helping a bit with the pooch like a Spanx without all that spandex.

6. Find a nursing position that works for you early: if you're breastfeeding and are of a certain height or posture, the fabulous Boppy may not be so much so if it's sitting right on your incision. Like the pillow brigade you've managed trying to sleep the past three months, get creative in positioning to feed your little one that still protects your middle. Then you won't have to think about it when you're incoherent during the night feedings as you've got a plan.

7. Keep the maternity clothes hanging: though if you're like me, your first instinct was to go ahead and light up that fire place (after all we're still getting snow in May) and get rid of those suckers, the looser styles and waists will help provide comfort your first weeks at home. Plus when you go to stretch the garment as you shouldn't to nurse at the top, you don't really care because you never.want.to.wear.them.again.

8. Familiarize yourself with your furniture again: it sounds crazy, but that comfy sunken couch, chair and even bed can leave you feeling a bit stuck with no one to rescue you from its desert of yumminess if you're home alone.

9. Send your older child to pre-school/daycare: not only to maintain his/her normalcy and routine, but so you can truly rest, rejuvenate and nap so you can be a better Mom when he/she returns home to your growing family. Also, find ways to include him/her with your limited activity such as extra snuggles, picnics on the family room rug for a special dinner or wild times with figurines on top of the coffee table.

10. Get real: talk with your girlfriends and vent when things get challenging and share the tiniest moments that are making it all worth it while you're at it too.

11. Have some basics ready on the home front: nursing gear, basic baby wear, somewhere for baby to sleep and diapers are a good start. That way you're not having to scramble or describe ad nauseum to those that are helping out on the basic stuff to get through a morning - it's all right there.

12. Don't beat yourself up: avoid mirrors or trying to find any type of clothing that will work for awhile; let the house be disasterous as long as roaches aren't making their way in; don't worry about being the perfect wife or friend, getting back on that diet or solving world hunger. After all, you literally just built and then had a human removed from you. That's enough for awhile, don't you think?

13. Keep your gadgets nearby: frequent texts of others thinking of you or taking a moment to look something up or check Facebook can be a little perk during the day. Plus you can look at how the gorgeous Kim K. is growing larger while you grow smaller.

14. "Sleep" comfortably: when/if you get a chance to sleep in the early weeks, find a comfortable position much like you had to when preggo. Use those pillows and respect the incision, waking and walking slowly as your pain meds will have worn off in the night. Though it's tempting to go right back to belly, right side and flat back positions, the body is still recovering and you'll feel it as it protests times ten now that you have a battle wound to go with it.

14: Take it a day at a time: like pregnancy, some days you find glimpses of your old self and others are just damn tough. Patience. Persistence. And lots of staring at that cute baby (it erases all bad!).

What other tips do you have for getting through the early weeks of this major abdominal surgery?